Forward. And Through.

Everywhere that I look I see remnants of you. I see you in the books stacked upon my floor due to lack of shelf space. I recall the evening you first came here and took your time looking at my books. But I also see you in them in that I search them for understanding and inspiration in regards to my life involving you. I search among the words of my heroes for guidance. I search their words for resounding validation, a call to the forefront of the pursuit, a call to carry the standard evermore into the depths, farther into the trenches, to carry on full speed into the unbending walls of this sliver of eternity. I search my books for an encouragement to lengthen out my mortal chime through the sound of my body crashing against those walls. The velocity at which I pursue and send myself sprinting into the wall will split my body in two when impact occurs. I desire that impact. I pursue what is beyond the wall and I sprint for that which gives my life a steady, comforting contraction and a calm breath… love. It is beyond the wall because it is eternal. And thus I pursue that which is only known by the gods and the intrinsic forces of this world: eternity and immortality. Love offers eternity and immortality through the supreme presence it gives a man’s mind in the moment and the precise fact that it can cleanse a man of all past regrets and future anxieties. It pulls your mind and your being into that exact moment at hand. Love can do this through clear awareness and connection with that person in front of you. Love is eternal as hope is eternal and unbounded. And it is undaunted by the boundaries of mortality. Death does not make a man in love shiver, it makes him smile against the shade. Love is eternal as the stories in my books are eternal; the story will not end on the last page. The moments within the pages are eternal and immortal. Once it has been felt and understood that moment can never be bound or contained, it is eternal and simultaneously it is momentous. I see you everywhere in this room. I see you in this moment. I see you beyond the walls of mortality. I see you in eternity. Sending myself without regard for mortal preservation against the walls that block us from eternity, I know the destruction that will come with the impact. And I am willing to sprint towards that destruction. The reckless insurgency of a mortal pursuing what is beyond the wall can only end in destruction, the ultimate cleansing. But to transcend into the eternity known only by those who are willing to rage into the wall for the worthiness of love, a mortal must be cleansed. That is how the gods became gods. They live beyond the confines of this time in the light of love because of their effort and disregard for satisfaction and comfort, they value effort and ethos and principle and action. I am willing to give my full measure to punch through for that love and for eternity. For your eyes to gaze upon me not in defeat but in admiration of effort and commendation for the destruction of my mortalilty, I am willing to give full measure. Destruction is not defeat. No mortal who is truly pursuing that which he loves can ever be defeated. Forward. And through.